by Erika Waddell
My latest obsession is MySpace.com. Perhaps, like me, you're one of its 67 million members. For those unfamiliar, it's a social networking site that was started in 2003 and is now owned by Rupert Murdoch's News Corporation. MySpace offers its members free Web profiles, which can include photos, blogs, internal messaging, and more. The site's member list is growing by the minute, attracting the young and old, and it just may be one of the greatest wastes of time ever created. Staying in on a Friday night? Don't feel like doing your homework? Your show is on a commercial break and you don't have a DVR? Whatever the reason, you can always kill time on MySpace.
How I Got Hooked
I was introduced to MySpace by a good friend living halfway across the country, who convinced me that it was the best way to keep in contact (phone tag had lost its charm). It worked. But little did I know that even if you don't tell people you're on MySpace, they will find you. And once the social web begins to weave itself, you will find that your new guilty pleasure quickly becomes an addiction.
Your Profile
The first thing you do when creating an account is to fill in some basic info about yourself, including your interests and your dating status (single, in a relationship, or swinger). One tricky situation emerges when you're in a new relationship but you're unsure of your dating status. Does it really matter? Well, it does if the person you're seeing is also on MySpace. It's likely that he's checking out your status daily, to see if you've officially advanced the relationship. Or worse, maybe you're both waiting to see what the other person does.
The Search Function
It's great to look up your creepy co-workers and find out who they are outside of the office. That quiet intern lives the "hip-hop" culture in his free time. Your colleague who looks like plain Jane is really an undercover party animal on the weekends. The computer nerds are total potheads. But be careful, because those folks are probably searching you too. And as funny as those Paris Hilton-Sidekick-style pictures are to you and your friends, your boss probably won't find them as amusing... or at least you hope not.
Not only can you search people by name, but you can also search for them by school, which comes in handy when trying to find people with whom you've lost touch. I lost track of a college friend and had been trying to find her since graduation. Turns out she had been looking for me too, and we found each other through MySpace. And if you're looking for fun, do a quick search of your graduating class. You can see who got married, who had children, who had illegitimate children, and more importantly, which losers got cute and which cuties got fat.
Friends
On every member's page, there is the "Friends" section that lists the photos of people you have either invited to be your friends or accepted their requests to be yours. But what happens when you don't really care for a "friend?" Do you snub him with a denial? Do you accept her even though you two may never have actually spoken? Do you have to be real-life friends? And what if you get denied?
You can also get celebrities and bands to be your "friends." And though you know you're not an actual friend of Kevin Federline's, it's somehow satisfying to know that you're that much closer to Britney.
The Top Eight
These are the eight friends you choose as a representative sample of your social circle. They appear as a fixture on your main page, so this is a big decision. Do you pick the most attractive people or your closest friends? Your homely roommate will know the answer. But it's a double-edged sword. If you're lucky enough (translation: hot enough) to make other people's list of eight, you run the risk of unwanted friend solicitations. People see your photo and, unfortunately, their computer screens act like a couple of beers, reducing inhibitions and giving them the nerve to drive-by friend-request you. I made the top eight on a friend's popular page, and suddenly I had the freaky freakies knocking down my inbox.
Anonymity
People can't tell you were looking at their pages. This makes stalking your ex, your crush, and your high school rival totally undetectable.
MySpace "Whores"
This is where MySpace gets a bad reputation. All the dorks who aren't cool in real life can suddenly become popular in cyber space by taking one decent photo of themselves and sending out a lot of friend invites. They think they're popular, but really they just spend more time on their computers than they do in the real world. Everyone knows who the MySpace "whores" are, and you don't want to be that guy.
Comments
Why be concerned with who your "friends" are? Because once you accept people as your friends, they have the privilege to post public comments on your page. I made the mistake of accepting an old high-school acquaintance who outed me as a band geek in high school. Not cool.
Conclusion
True, the site can become a catalyst for real-life drama and mess with your head, but it's also a great way to find people you care about and stay in touch with them. So give it try. You never know who might be looking for you.
(Published on CourtTV.com March 30, 2006)
